So I bought a bass clarinet...

Ever since I came back from Paris, and heard "Epistrophy" by Eric Dolphy, I've had a pretty crazy dream: to some day retire to Paris and spend my days playing under the Eiffel Tower. The bass clarinet has always sounded like one of the most beautiful instruments: the lows especially vibrate parts of me I didn't know I had.

There's just one problem: bass clarinets are expensive. Bass clarinets in playable condition even moreso.

When I started this quest, I put an add in craigslist just looking for one. Brandi from The Music Box contacted me. She told me she was actually a bass clarinet major at Iowa State! We talked about exchanging bass clarinet lessons for bass lessons, but she didn't have any bass clarinets in stock. She did eventually sell me a nice alto sax that I played with for a while. It wasn't the same. Eventually I stopped hearing from her and I'd pretty much given up.

Then, yesterday, I stopped into Mister Money to do a little pedal shopping, when I saw an entire shelf of BAND INSTRUMENTS real cheap! It's like Harold Hill had to leave town and sell everything for a bus ticket! Best of all, not ONE but TWO bass clarinets!! The other had a case and was $299.00, but the other, a Bundy, was marked at $99!! I went to the counter and pointed out some dings and rust, and they sold it to me for $70!!!!!!



Well, the next thing is to get a reed. I went straight to Uptempo Music in Beaverdale. When I brought it in, Dave was like, "Wow, a bass clarinet!" then while I was showing him, he looked at the price tag.

"You did NOT pay 99 dollars for this"
"I didn't. I paid $70."

I also told him they had a much nicer Vito in a case for $300. I think he's gonna go get that one.

I bought a reed,and then talked about what few repairs it would need to be playable. He mentioned that the person who does his band instrument repairs was actually a BASS CLARINET MAJOR in college! Guess who??

Next I took it to Polk City, where my Ladyfriend gave it a fresh cleaning and she and her daughter (who play Alto Sax) took turns playing it! Yes! It works!

More on this story as it develops...

Rock and Bowl: A modest proposal.

So, I'm waiting for my coffee to cool and my Genuine Counterfeit PreEmbargo Cubans to arrive by UPS from my friends at JR Cigars, and I remembered something I brought up earlier in the week that needs more fleshing out.

One of the biggest complaints about the Des Moines music scenes is...okay the biggest complaint is there's a lot of sucky bands and too few venues. AFTER that, though, the biggest complaint is that bands are always tearing each other down and there's no comraderie. Overall, the scene suffers. Just take a look at the typical Craigslist bullshit that flares up from time to time.

Okay. The English have Soccer. There's all kinds of great stories of legendary British bands having a bit of footie for fun. Hip Hop has basketball. Death Metal bands have Dungeons and Dragons nights--okay, I can't back that one up...

This is all a bit too athletic for most bands I know. However, they all like to drink beer and hate golf. This leads to BOWLING! It's not all that athletic, but has enough individual and team competition to keep it interesting. You keep score, but noone takes it too seriously (unless your name is Walter Sobchak). And you can rent EVERYTHING neccessary so no intial cost is necessary. Plus there's that vintage thing for all those ironic hipsters out there.

Bands on Board so Far:
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Black Storm Alice
Porkins' Ghost
Superchief (at least one of them)

Spread the word! I'll make brackets and everything! Each band will be a team. This is just for fun for now. Maybe in the future, we can get some sponsors and have a championship or something. This would be a great opportunity to hang out and/or network in a mellow, not-so-loud, non-competitive environment.

I'm looking for feedback here, so I'm publicizing this post. We'll see what happens.